Wishing all of the fathers and father figures a Happy Father’s Day.
Wishing peace and sending prayers to the children whose fathers have transitioned or have no relationship with their Fathers who are living.
Sending extra love to the fathers whose children have transitioned. If you’re unable to celebrate them, do something special and loving for yourself today.
Honoring my dad today the unofficial originator of the “selfie ”
Repost from the P.A.M. (Preserve a Mom) Project :
I’m happy to share that Dr. Renée D. Charles has offered a safe space for the community to discussion the film When They See Us and Wellness Coach Retha Fernandez of Soul of Long Island, LLC has offered her meditation services as well.
Together we invite the community to join us in a conversation
(safe space) about the film, mental health advocacy, healing past traumas and wellness in the black community.
Click the link to join us in Hempstead – space is limited: https://howweseeourselves.eventbrite.com
Enjoy the day Beloved ~
“In order for us as poor and oppressed people to become a part of a society that is meaningful, the system under which we now exist has to be radically changed. It means facing a system that does not lend itself to your needs and devising means by which you can change that system. That is easier said than done.” — Ella Baker (Dec. 13, 1903 – Dec. 13, 1986).
Baker was a civil rights and human rights activist beginning in the 1930s whose career spanned more than five decades. She was instrumental in the launch of the Student Nonviolent Coordinating Committee (SNCC). Read her profile on the Zinn Education Project website.
This portrait is available as a poster for $20 from Americans Who Tell the Truth.
We cannot afford to sit and wait for the current system to support our needs as it is, we need to take action that will lead to radical change. We do it not just for us but for our children and generations to come.
Please share our blog to friends and family and let us know what other information you’d like to see here! We’re also on Facebook sharing lots of good information and patenting support.
Thanks for stopping by!
African American Parenting
With the onset of the new school year, and the return to packing lunches and planning meals for a household of busy family members I am always conscious of the food that I provide for my family. My goal is always to make sure my children get plenty of rest, a good nutritional breakfast before they head off to school, snacks if necessary and a good healthy lunch for those who prefer not to eat the lunch provided at their school.
I’ve always felt good about our health. Yes we could exercise more and eat less snacks during the day but I almost always buy organic vegetables and fruits, I rarely cook red meat (when I do its grass-fed beef )and only purchase organic poultry and wild caught fish. I don’t use sugar, only agave nectar or raw honey if I need a sweetener for tea, and almond milk is the only beverage other than water that you’ll find in my refrigerator. During holiday or other gatherings at my home, relatives and friends would joke about my organic version of soul food dishes and the lack of preservatives in the snacks I provided and I would laugh along and remind them that I would have the last laugh.
Or so I thought until I stumbled upon What the Health on Netflix. I had been thinking about removing meat from my diet because I noticed that I experienced more inflammation and less energy when I ate meat. Yet I was also aware that I had to consider my growing teenage son and pre-teen daughter and I knew that carbs and protein were essential to their diet especially during the school year. I was convinced that meat was the best source of protein and bread/pasta the best carbohydrate. Boy was I wrong! I was stunned by the information revealed in this documentary. My uncle and grandfather both maintained their own backyard farms and my ancestors worked on Georgian farms most of their lives. I knew that the earth provided everything we needed to sustain us as human beings but after experiencing these five revelations watching both movies I realized that I needed to make another lifestyle change:
- Watching Food Inc. after this documentary confirms a lot of information that these industries are trying to conceal. The information in What the Health, even seeing the three health transformations in the movie, can seem extreme without watching the documentary Food Inc. It’s a totally unrelated documentary but for me it removed any doubt.
- Major food companies selling quick, overly processed and preserved foods are also contributing to the major health organizations that we trust to work towards our healing. The American Diabetes Association, The American Cancer Society and other major health organizations that we rely on to provide the best health and dieting resources are all financially supported by companies that produce unhealthy foods.
- Diabetes is an insurmountable health crisis; the fact that it disproportionately affects African-Americans can be directly related to food choice and availability of affordable, fresh foods in the urban communities. I myself visited the same “Fresh” supermarket in both a suburban and urban neighborhood and found mold and partially rotted vegetables in the urban supermarket and the price of the same vegetable was more expensive.
- Vegetarian and Vegan eating is the ultimate goal, but can’t be achieved overnight. It’s not just a diet change, it’s a mindset. I eat fairly well, but it is a process and if you go into it with the idea of transitioning and not beating yourself up when you eat a processed food or a meat, you will have more success. Give yourself a timeline and work with a nutritionist or health consultant to create meal plans and shopping lists to help you transition. I was inspired by The Healthconscious Diva’s Facebook live and blog posts. Her customized meal plans and shopping lists are reasonable and in her videos shows you how to prepare some of the dishes.
- Don’t beat yourself up after watching the movie. The information hit me like a gut-punch and as a parent I felt a bit of guilt for the food choices I’ve made in the past; driving through the fast food lane to get to a baseball practice in time or the countless amount of hot dogs and ice cream eaten during their early growth years. The information is bold and un-apologetic and yes promotes the vegan lifestyle encouraging the masses to increase the amount of food consumed from the earth and generally make better food choices. Reducing the amount of sugar you use and/or making a decision to remove fast food from your diet is progress. Purchasing organic meats or meat and produce from local farmers is much better for your health than not.
It’s progress not perfection. Give yourself time to transition to a more healthy lifestyle and if you have not yet watched the movie I strongly suggest you watch it. Watch with an open mind and consider your own family’s health issues and then make the changes large or small to guarantee you will be around to watch your great-grandchildren dance!
I’d love to hear what you thought about one or both movies!
My son and daughter are five years apart. My favorite picture of the two of them was taken the day my daughter was born. My son had taken a big brother class at the hospital and understood that she would look up to him and follow him as the older sibling. The first time they met, she gazed up into his eyes and I’m so grateful my sister-in-law captured it on film. He loved being my helper, getting her diaper or toys when I asked and I tried to give him all of the quality time I could when she was napping or down for the night.
Even after the separation, as a solo parent I would still be conscious of the attention that she naturally received as the baby of the family. I made sure they were treated equally regarding chores and rules and would let him stay up to watch television or play a game with me after I tucked her in at night. What I refer to as our night-time snuggle hour (it was cute then, not so much now that he’s a teenager) is a tradition now and even though he won’t admit it, I know he looks forward to it at least once or twice a week. Now that my son is a teenager and my daughter a tween, both are going through emotional and physical changes which naturally distances them. As an introvert, he spends a lot of time in his room and she commands my time and all of the rest of the space in the house with her creative endeavors. I understand that they need the space to develop in their own way but I have to admit it’s been difficult as a parent watching powerless, as age difference, school and puberty send them to their separate corners of the world.
I must admit I had given up on our family rituals. Running a household, business and caring for two school aged children is more than a full-time job. I’m usually ready to go to bed before they do, and I felt that they had grown out of our summer vacations, back to school gifts, end of school dinner celebration, church service (twice a month if we can), midnight or early morning movies in our pajamas, Friday pizza and movie nights and other traditions until recently. For the first time in close to a year we watched a movie together last night sharing pizza and the same couch! I almost always order pizza and this past year I would be the only one sitting on the couch watching the movie or most likely it would be just my daughter and I. Last night was different. I ordered the pizza and made plans to go out to a local fundraiser when I expected the kids would be retired to their rooms; but as usual when I make plans, God laughs! After the pizza was demolished I turned on The Dark Knight and invited my son to sit and watch it with me. Years ago he was fascinated by all of the Marvel and DC Comics but gave it up when he got the message from peers that enjoying action figures was childish. I walked out of the room and was floored when I saw him actually reclining on the couch waiting for me. My daughter, not to be outdone fought for her spot on the couch too. I had to play referee once or twice but we watched the entire movie together as a family. I was waiting for them both the bail mid-movie but they didn’t. I silently apologized to my conscience for missing the fundraiser so I could be present, enjoying the snuggle and bonding time with my children instead. I went to bed hopeful and determined to slowly reinstate the not so typical family traditions that we have created over the years. At a time when so much in their lives is changing, the ability to rely on mom’s sometimes quirky traditions offers the nurturing and stability they so desperately need. I am aware that every night may not have a fairy tale ending and that traditions may continue to be tested, yet I remain encouraged. Pizza and move night was a reminder that consistency is important and not to give up until the miracle happens.
What are some of the non-traditional traditions that bring your family together? Feel free to share in the comments below or email us at firstname.lastname@example.org.
~African American Parenting
Happy New Year! Heri Za Kwanzaa (Happy Kwanzaa) ! Wishing you an abundance of joy, love and all things positive in the coming year. It has been a while since African-American Parenting has posted and I am committed to sharing on a more consistent basis in 2017. The past year has been tumultuous and we have been watching the community struggle, fight and bravely stand up for the preservation of our families, children and neighborhoods. There have been a lot of innocent lives lost yet it is promising to see the eruption of organizations and movements committed to fighting against brutality, inequality and institutionalized racism.
Our focus at African-American Parenting is to not only inform but to be a place of support and resource for those families, parents and community organizations to gather, share stories and find comfort and unity. Please feel free to email us at email@example.com if you would like to submit a story, essay to the blog. Also if you have an idea, question, problem or anything you would like to see addressed or published on the blog, feel free to leave it in the comment section below.
Please visit and become a “friend” of our Facebook page for African American Parenting which is often updated with local (tri-state area of NJ, PA, DE) and sometimes national events that support and educate the African-American community.
By no coincidence, on the seventh and final day of Kwanzaa, Imani (Faith) our family prepares for a Karamu (feast) where we break bread and share libations, review the Nguzo Saba (seven principles) and symbols of Kwanzaa, honor our ancestors and enjoy the love and accomplishments of both elders and youth.
Following in this tradition, it is for us then a time to ask and answer soberly and humbly the three Kawaida questions: Who am I; am I really who I say I am; and am I all I ought to be? And it is, of necessity, a time to recommit ourselves to our highest ideals, in a word, to the best of what it means to be both African and human in the fullest sense. ~ From The Official Kwanzaa Website
It is the best way for us to bring in the new year. In the spirit of Imani, we call upon our ancestors for their wisdom and strength and use the energy of the day and the collective village to sustain and increase our faith. With the uncertainties of the coming year it is the most important weapon in my humble opinion.
Wishing you an abundant new year!